SPECIAL DELIVERY TO THE WAITING ROOM, PLEASE

IMG_8287-001Today, unfortunately, my kids are sick. We all are sick. It is not the things you give to your kids, but the illnesses that they give YOU that really make you feel barely alive!

My kids have the typical fever and runny nose thing. They don’t want to eat anything unless it is ice cream or has frosting on it (I put ice cream on watermelon and frosting on yams, so life is good here)

I feel like I have a big fully loaded semi parked on my face. I have the sinus infection from He*l. I think my head has been invaded by a percusison section that is in a perpetual state of warming up.

We sat, the three of us, in MY doctor’s office (the kids, you see, are handling the high fever well……they either are inert on the couch or running around trailing long lines of mucous behind them). I required a shot and three different prescriptions. Will probably be a few days before I feel  like doing anything more strenuous than blowing my nose.

Of course, as it will be, my kids completely humiliated me while I was in the throes of incredible illness in the extremely crowded waiting room at my doctor.

Apparently, they have a NEW doctor in their practice. I think they now have something like 367 doctors jammed into this building. They really needed another one. The waiting room is already like Grand Central Station at rush hour on the eve before Thanksgiving.

This new doctor will be seeing pediatric patients, so they had a giant poster of a stork delivering a baby. My three year old son is really into birds, so he wanted to know what kind of bird it was. My five year old son likes trying to read signs.

I started to explain that the sign was to welcome a new doctor to the building.

My older one says “Hey! I know what kind of bird that is! It is a DORK! So the sign must say “Welcome DORKS! Do you think he just IS a DORK, or he treats DORKS, too??””

Of course, it was a geriatric crowd in the waiting room, and I do believe they were all there for some kind of severe humor impairment. They all turned and gave us that one eyed glare with the pinched up lips like they had been sucking on a group lemon and did the whole sniff in the air thing, as if they were saying “MY kids sure were NEVER like that”.

Oh well. SO they had boring kids. And a rotten life now. I encouraged my son to go up to the frontIMG_1545 desk and ask about the new dork. Hey….I wasn’t feeling well and I REALLY needed the laugh!

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